I know I posted a comment on my last post, but to save you the trouble of going and finding it, here's the skinny:
I woke up this morning to go down and get the offered free breakfast from the hostel (none of the others have had this so far). As I was eating I was actually feeling a bit sick - not home sick, but physically sick. But I made myself keep eating because I was going to take any free food, still unsure if my cards worked or not, so I didn't know if and for how long I would have to stretch my 20 Euros.
I really didn't feel like I had any energy so I went back to bed. I didn't wake up until nearly 1 p.m. here. I was feeling better so I decided to get dressed and just walk around the area near my hostel. I was actually hoping to find where Notre Dame was located...apparently it's a 10/15 minute walk from here. But I couldn't find the way out of my street - my maps are either wrong or I have no sense of direction. I'm guessing the maps are wrong.
So I walked up and down the main street and down a few side streets to see what there was to see to sort of get a feel for the general area. I noticed about half way through I was starting to feel hungry. I really haven't been hungry since I landed a week ago in Rome. Even when Rachel and I ate in Genoa I didn't know I was hungry until I ate. Considering how I had felt this morning I started looking for something simple. I actually found a Subway of all things: and holy crap it was delicious! I got the BMT so it was ham, salomi, and pepperoni and it was 100x better than the stuff in America. After I was done, I was feeling really tired again and my stomach wasn't feeling the best. I'm guessing the constant traveling, the emotions and stress going up and down have finally started to wear on me - coupled with the knowledge that I'm here for just over a week so I can have a day of nothing but rest. So even though it's early, I've come back to the hostel and have just decided to read and really take it easy. I'm probably going to go to bed early tonight too and hope I'm really feeling up to getting and going tomorrow.
A bit about home: Now, I know I've said it before, but when I planned this trip, I didn't think it would be that hard to leave home, knowing I was coming back in a month. It's not like I signed a contract to leave the country for an unknown amount of time and I wasn't sure when I'd see everyone. I've found out (I'm not sure if it's the hard way, but it's a way) leaving by yourself to places where you have to depend on the kindness of strangers, your own inner strength and intelligence, and the knowledge you have of people believing in you from so far away, is much much harder than it sounds.
My family has always been very important to me, and I've known that, but I didn't realize to what extent before. Now I know: I have to be near them. I can be by myself and do just fine, but I love knowing that people I love and who love me are near by. That is one of the best souvenirs I'm bring back from this trip and it didn't cost anything, but it is priceless. The other thing I'm rediscovering is faith. It's a completely different story, but when I was 15/16 I was honestly questioning if I believed in any God at all. I had something happen that completely solidified my faith in God at just the right time and I've never had any doubt since then; but since I started college my faith was sort of on the back burner and laid dormant. This trip has helped to...restore/rekindle...it. That was just one more thing I didn't know I needed it to make it through this month and I'm going to make every effort to keep it when I come home.
Sadly, for you all, there are no pictures for this post, but if you look at a picture of yourself and at each other, you'll be looking at one of my greatest souvenirs! (if that helps).
Even though I'm not feeling the best, today is really the first day on this whole trip where I actually feel content/settled/at peace - not exactly sure what the right word is.
Not exactly sure what the plan is for tomorrow - I'm hoping I feel a bit better - but I think I might try to figure out the Metro here and go see the Eiffel Tower. There are free tours of Notre Dame on Wednesdays so that's my plan for Wednesday at least.
Miss and love you all, Homies!
Oh, Steph....what a wonderful post! You are truely having a spirtual journey and finding inner peace. How blessed you are at such a young age to have found it on your own. I am so happy for you and found myself crying reading your discovery. Enjoy the contentment you have found and enjoy your Paris adventure! Hope you're feeling better and can get out there and seize the week ahead! Love you! Amis
ReplyDeleteThose are two of the things I really discovered when I was in Europe too. It was really rewarding and challenging (in a good way) to travel alone, but when I go again, I want to bring family or friends. And my faith definitely grew there too, because God was the One I was always sure was with me in the scary moments. I'm glad you're growing while you're over there!
ReplyDeleteHow long are you in Paris again? You're going to love it. If you're looking for something leisurely to do when you're not feeling good or particularly energetic, go sit in the park near the Eiffel Tower. Good people watching, and you'll also feel very Parisian!
There are also beautiful little gardens and sitting areas around Notre Dame. I have a distinct memory of sitting at one of those benches reading Narnia and eating a baguette with nutella. Another good thing to do when you're not feeling so great.
You're totally rocking this! There are endless things to experience in Paris, so live it up!
Oh, my goodness, I totally saw some of the parks and they had fountains and I really wanted to jump in today (remembering what you said about being the crazy American). I'm actually going to be here through next Monday/Tuesday so plenty of time to soak it up. I was wondering if you ever used Ryanair? I'm taking that to Dublin and it'll be good, but I'm worried they're going to tag my backpack as too big and charge me 100 Euros extra to check it. I was just curious if you've had any experience with them.
DeleteSame as Amis....You brought tears to my eyes with this entry. Maybe it's the Mom in me, but to hear you appreciate your family so much really touched me. I'm so happy that this has not only been a 'physical' journey, but a spiritual one too. Amazing.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Brian! This would be the perfect time to grab that big ol' book that you brought and find a cozy little garden or park to read and watch people. Give your body and soul a moment to just appreciate everything that you're seeing and feeling and experiencing.
Peace.
Oh, thanks guys! I totally didn't mean to make anyone cry...I really felt like this was one of my more 'flat' entries, but I wanted to post something yesterday, and since it was something I've been thinking about, I wanted to share.
ReplyDeleteI'm actually in Paris through Monday morning, quite possibly, Tuesday (see my newest post for details).
Maybe Thursday I'll take my book and read at the Eiffel Tower...does that sound wierd/cool? I think it does. Who says that? huh.
Thanks again for all the continued support. I really don't feel all that interesting so the fact you're keeping track of me is so cool. Love you all!
Don't apologize for making us cry! You moved us....that's a good thing. :-)
DeleteOh.... And you ARE interesting, you silly bunny!